Darini Rajasingham Senanayake/ I’m the king of Lanka/ And I like a tight vagina

Ever fancied a string of fatuous non sequitur up your ass? If you’re a masochistic sucker for those kind of stuff you can read Darini Rajasingham Senanayake’s latest article “Checkmate, Rajapakse! The UN Report, Militarism and Public Religion in Sri Lanka” on Groundviews. But I, as someone who had the great misfortune of stumbling upon her imperceptive excuse for an article suggest you don’t. My ass still hurts and I could barely sit to write this.

She starts her dimwitted post by quoting a poem from Omar Khayvam’s Rubaiyat. Why, you ask me? Well that sexually frustrated middle-aged woman Tisaranee Gunasekara does that, and so does the dishonest, son-of-neo-fascist, wannabe-intellectual Dayan Jayatillake. So she must have asked herself, why not her? Why not me, I asked myself. The following was written by James Fenton.

I Am The King of China
And I Like A Tight Vagina:
It Lets Me Show The Things I Know—
Like The Prose Style of George Steiner.

(Please replace the words as necessary)

Alright, now that we’ve said fuck off to Omar Khayvam, let’s focus on what Darini has actually written. Let’s see…mmm…ever wondered how a king can get butt-fucked in a game of Chess? Apparently there’s a move in Chess called “The Great Banki the Moon Kick” that can literally butt-fuck the black king. The first stage is called “check”. This is when the white knight places his sword lightly upon the king’s posterior. The next one is called a “stalemate” where a white bishop places his hands on that white knights’s butt and pushes him towards the king so that the sword slides deep into the black kings’s rectum. The last step is called “checkmate”. This is when the king starts bleeding. Now that you know this, you’re a Grandmaster, just like Darani.

In Darini’s educated opion, our king Mahinda Rajapakse was stalemated at the time she wrote her article. But the direction of the game is clear. The white knight has already done his thing, and the bishop has shown what years of practice with altar boys have given him. US citizens subject to US jurisdiction are already bleeding. Obama is ready to pee on the global gene pool in order to free it from thugs like Gotabhaya and bugs like Shavendra Silva. At this point, the average Tamil and the average UNPer are frothing and masturbating on to their keyboards.

Then she writes something so stupid, so dumb fucking retarded that I suggest that she runs to the nearest beach, take off all her clothes, jump into the sea and swim to Antarctic. She writes “To avoid ‘checkmate’ the regime will need to resolve the root causes of the ethnic conflict and learn to share power with the minorities at the center and in the regions. Enabling or disabling genuine reconciliation, democracy and power-sharing in Lanka will be the litmus test of the international community’s resolve.” According to what she has said earlier, Mahinda Rajapakse is about to get butt-fucked by the international community for the crimes he’s committed. The protests by university dons and students against government policies, low wages and the militarization of higher education, as well as protests by women workers in the Free Trade Zones against a private sector pension scheme, herald the gathering storm. And now, he can put an end to all that by giving a tiny little piece of land to Tamils? Why doesn’t she being the necrophile she is, dig up the body of some dead LTTE fuck and suck its dead dick? I’m all for punishing war criminals, but this kind of stupidity just makes me mad.

You might think that’s the only butt-fucking thing she’s written. Oh, how wrong can you be? She wants Mahinda “…to request current Prime Minister D.M Jayaratne to resign and replace him with a citizen from a minority community, preferably a Tamil because it is this community that has suffered the most due to state discrimination, the root cause of the war.” So let me get this straight. She wants our more or less democratically elected President to fire the currant Prime Minister and appoint for the post someone whose most important qualification for the job is his race? Fucking bitch.