Yep. Indi P Samarajiva thinks rap is poetry. I’m not going to link to the place where he said that because he banned me from his blog. But in an article titled ‘Why Writing Will Live’ he wrote “Just like rap is really poetry, this is writing.” All I can say about this is “hah hah ha.” Anyway, here’s what Eminem, the greatest poet of all time according to I.P. Samarajiva, has to say about himself.

Slim Shady, brain dead like Jim Brady,

I’m M80, you lil’ like that Kim lady,

I’m buzzin, Dirty Dozen, naughty rotten rhymer,

Cursin at you players worse than Marty Schottenheimer,

You wacker than the motherfucker you bit your style from,

You ain’t gonna sell two copies if you press a double album,

Admit it, fuck it, while we comin out in the open.

Again, hah hah hah ha. I know appreciation of poetry is subjective. But again, hah hah hah ha. Meanwhile, here’s a poem John Keats wrote to Byron.

Byron! How sweetly sad thy melody!

Attuning still the soul to tenderness,

As if soft Pity, with unusual stress,

Had touch’d her plaintive lute, and thou, being by,

Hadst caught the tones, nor suffer’d them to die.