The best investigative blogger of all time : Taprobane Uncut


There is terror in the air; the feeling that if I make the slightest mistake, that’ll be my final mistake. Between sips of green tea, he explains to me how he built a network of Deep Throats in an world of assassin squads and torture chambers. “Someone has to do it you know” he tells me. “Someone has to risk his life to tell a story that nobody seems to want to hear”… Taprobane Uncut became a household name when he won the “The coservative award for best investigative blogger with an un-gay writing style” in 2010 when he exposed what Indrajit Samarajiva did under the pretense of whale-watching. Since then, there’s been no stopping him… There’s a pause. He’s deep into reminiscing about the clandestine meetings where he clinked glasses with such murderous thugs like Ranil Wickramesinhe, and fraudsters like Indrajit Samarajiva. His beautiful deep blue eyes look tearful. These tears are evidence to the sacrifices this blogger, this journalist, this man, must have made to let the truth out… Contrary to the common belief, the beautiful colour of eyes isn’t artificially achieved. But it isn’t natural either. It is the result of his great committment to what he does. He tells me the story with an ambiguous smile. “It’s the result of me watching Indi whale-watching. Indi was trying to see whether whales have giant testicles. Since I’m not a gay-zoophile, I could never do that. For less obvious reasons, I couldn’t keep on looking at his bare back either. So I had my eyes set on the deep dark blue ocean. My relationship with the ocean has always been sexual” … Although his investigative reports have appeared only on his own blog, which has a tiny readership of about 45 daily visitors, he’s been hailed as a “true hero” by such reputable personalities like DIG Vaas Gunawardena and Minister Mervin Silva. According to the former, “he was a pioneer when nobody else was out there.” What Minister Mervin Silva says tells it all. “Uncut can do what I do with a gun, with a pen and a notebook.”


One Response to “The best investigative blogger of all time : Taprobane Uncut”

  1. Sigma Says:

    Ah Lefroy, now thats writing!

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