Beware! There are Paedophiles on Kottu
( lefroy.wordpress.com )I’ve come to notice that five child or early teen bloggers have joined Kottu just days ago. The five blogs I’m referring to are Chathurikasanda’s Blog, Ravishma’s Blog, Vikumjaya’s Blog, Hashanumayanga’s Blog and Lahirusandun’s Blog. Now kids, blogging is great. It’s cool. It’s hip. It’ll improve your writing skills. But kids, let me give you the best advice you’ll ever be given. Kottu is a dangerous place for kids. There are lot of paedophiles. So please be careful… You know kids, your beloved king Mahinda Maama is a well known paedophile. You know what they do right? They abuse children. They want to have sex with children… Now kids the thing is that most of the bloggers here are Mahinda’s propagandists, and just like their boss, they too are paedophiles. They have sexual desires for you guys… The Lanka Libertarian blogger named Sittingnut is the most notorious of them all. This child-molester usually gets to know kids like you by first commenting on your beautiful little essays about rainbows and flowers and panties. He will praise you, say that you’re writing beautiful prose (even if you write like Dan Brown), or tell you that your posts are marvellously original. He does all that only to befriend you. The truth is that he doesn’t give a crap about how you write or what you write… Then, once you start to think that you know this forty-something, super cool Uncle, he’ll want to meet you and see your pretty little faces, and hear your sweet little voices. Then he’d want to take you to someplace magical. To show you how beautiful the life can be. Kids, I don’t want to go into what he’ll do to you next… So kids, please be careful. Uncle Sittingnut could be the most notorious paedophile on Kottu, but he’s not the only one. There are many Uncles who have come to that point of life when they’d stick things into any hole they see. There are Aunties who really love it when fishes in the ocean swim into someplace between their legs. So again, kids, be careful, and let your parent’s know everything you do.